Sometimes it takes the words of others to soothe our own soul.
If you’re feeling anxious or have an anxious child, write a few of these down or print them out and keep them handy. 1. “The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.” ~William James. The Present. What Does It Mean to Let Go? In this human life we get our share of joys and our share of sorrows.
The brain is wired to hang onto the fears and sorrows more than the joys so that it guard against what’s uncomfortable and keep us safe. However, in doing this we have the experience of holding onto the difficult in our lives and many of us would enjoy the ability to “let go” a little easier. One of my favorite paths in teaching isn’t through the intellect, but through poetry which can reach beyond the rational brain and more directly to the emotional brain where our decision making and “holding” lies.
Here is a poem that speaks directly to the possibility of letting go. Pause…Take a Breath…Read…See What Arises She let go She let go. . ~ Reverend Safire Rose Before you allow judgments to arise about whether it’s possible for letting go to be this close, just allow these words to settle into your mind. Warmly, Elisha Author of Uncovering Happiness: Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self-Compassion. Mindfully Free of Wanting People to Be a Certain Way.
By Leo Babauta One of the biggest sources of difficulties for every single human being is the desire for people to be a certain way.
We can’t seem to help it: we want the world to be the way we want it. Unfortunately, reality always has different plans, and people behave in less-than-ideal ways. The problem isn’t other people. It’s our ideals. Yes, I think it would be great if people stopped killing animals for food and fashion, and became vegan instead. Yes, I think it would be great if my kids behaved perfectly all the time, but that’s not the reality of kids. Yes, it would be great if my wife always agreed with me, but that’s not going to happen. So the problem is: We have ideals about how people should act, or ways we’d like them to be.People don’t act in those ideal ways, or aren’t the way we’d like them to be.We get bothered by that reality. Our Everloving Quest to Control Our Lives. By Leo Babauta Almost our entire lives are spent in a quest to gain control, security and comfort in our lives.
Unfortunately, we never really get it, so we keep trying, relentlessly. This is the main activity of our lives. What would happen if we stopped? We could be less restricted by fear, less anxious, less driven by the need for comfort … and more in love with life as it is. You might be surprised by how much we strive for control. The Ways We Try to Get Control The basic nature of life is that it is everchanging, uncontrollable.
And this kinda freaks us out. Some examples among many: There are thousands more examples. Now, I’m not saying these strategies are bad. But it is good to be aware of this need for control, and perhaps this awareness can even help us free ourselves. Why These Attempts at Control Keep Failing So we do everything above, all day long, when things are feeling uncertain, uncomfortable, out of control, unsafe. The Illusion of Control: Are There Benefits to Being Self-Deluded? Do people always overestimate how much they control their lives?
The ‘illusion of control’ is this: people tend to overestimate their perceived control over events in their lives. It’s well documented and has been tested over-and-over in lots of different studies over four decades. Here’s an example: you choose an apple which tastes delicious. You assume you are very skilled at choosing apples (when in fact the whole batch happens to be good today). Another: you enter the lottery and win millions. Sometimes this illusion manifests as magical thinking. It’s like pedestrians in New York who still press the button to get the lights to change, despite the fact they do nothing. A beneficial illusion? It’s sometimes argued that the illusion of control is beneficial because it can encourage people to take responsibility.
Feeling in control can also urge us on to do things when the chances of success are low.
Trust. Alertness. Boundaries. Sadness. Books. Regeneration.