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17 Incredible Autostraddle Personal Essays By Trans Women. From 2009 through 2011, Autostraddle’s coverage of trans issues could best be characterized as a series of blunders, failures and missteps. Raised on movies like Ace Ventura: Pet Detective and coming into our lesbian identities in bars and at queer parties occupied by queer cis women and trans men, Laneia and I never decided to intentionally exclude trans women from Autostraddle… we’d just not thought about trans women at all, not even for one second.

When we published our first essay by a new trans male writer and readers asked where the trans women were at, I remember thinking “but trans women don’t date women, they date men, right?” Um, wrong! (In fact, the best numbers we have on the topic indicate that two-thirds of trans women identify as lesbian, bisexual, or queer.) Oh my friends, that was just the tip of the “shit I was wrong about” and “things I am so sorry about” iceberg. So we set out to educate ourselves and be better. Here’s what’s gone up for Trans Awareness Week so far: Ruby Rose and What Makes Gender Non-Conforming 'Sexy' (Or Not) | Rich Hawkins. Ruby Rose is the girl of the moment.

She's fearless, she's eloquent and she is, undoubtedly, very good-looking. If Orange is the New Black is loved for diversifying TV and celebrating difference, then Ruby Rose is the perfect casting. Androgyny is not something often considered beautiful, so for her to redefine beauty and still have mass appeal is very exciting. But it does raise questions over why some gender non-conformity is celebrated while other forms are ridiculed or ignored. Laverne Cox raised a really interesting point recently about Caitlyn Jenner, or more accurately the reaction to her 'unveiling.' In a blog post, Cox notes that Caitlyn was hugely commended for being beautiful, and indeed Cox herself has been heralded many times as beautiful, but actually that can become a problem for women who are less easily able to conform to cisnormative beauty standards.

5 Most Disappointing Things We Learned About HRC's 'White Men's Club' “As a woman, I feel excluded every day,” says an employee of the Human Rights Campaign, the nation's largest LGBT civil rights advocacy group and political lobbying organization, in an internal diversity report released Wednesday. The report was compiled by The Pipeline Project, and commissioned by HRC through focus groups and surveys with employees of the company. The report revealed that the organizational structure of HRC perpetuates sexism, while leaders have failed to establish a “real push for diversity,” which has created a “homogenous” leadership culture that is “gay, white, male.” BuzzFeed News legal editor Chris Geidner first broke the story, revealing "major diversity problems" within the organization. Geidner noted that the report included complaints from many staffers that the work environment at HRC is “extremely judgmental,” especially of women and female-identified people.

A third of all staff in the report called HRC's working environment is “exclusionary.” 1. 2. 3. 4. Revealing Caitlyn Jenner: My Thoughts on Media, Privilege, Healthcare Access & Glamour ‹ Janet Mock. Posted by: Janet Posted date: June 3, 2015 10 Comments Categories: GirlsLikeUs, National Headlines, Trans in the Media, Trans Women, TV June 3, 2015 I wasn’t planning to write about the Vanity Fair cover introducing Caitlyn Jenner to the public.

This lack-of-a-response was not reflective of my excitement about seeing Caitlyn present as her most authentic (and glam!) Self for the first time. My live-tweets are more reflective of my initial feelings (see below). But I’ve since found it necessary to write my thoughts down because my silence has been interpreted in ways I find unnecessary and harmful. –When In Touch Weekly photoshopped Jenner’s image onto another woman’s body –When the media refused to embrace the gender neutral use of ”they” –When I got the first interview with Laverne Cox, who spoke to me exclusively about her reaction to seeing Jenner speak for the first time with Diane Sawyer in April. To make any trans person a symbol for an entire community is an unfair task. Martin1991.pdf. Patheos. Thank you for your interest in Patheos newsletters! Please enter your email address below and click the "Subscribe" button.

Thank you for your subscription. You can visit your Preference Center to complete your profile and see what else we have to offer. We apologize, we were unable to complete your subscription at this time, please try again later. If this error persists please contact us at communications@patheos.com. Like what you're reading? 10 Simple Steps to Being a Better Cis Partner to Your Trans Girlfriend | SheWired. 7 Deadly Sins Parents Commit Against Their Transgender Kids – In Memory of Leelah Alcorn. Thank you for your interest in Patheos newsletters! Please enter your email address below and click the "Subscribe" button. Thank you for your subscription. You can visit your Preference Center to complete your profile and see what else we have to offer. We apologize, we were unable to complete your subscription at this time, please try again later. If this error persists please contact us at communications@patheos.com.

Like what you're reading? 6 Transgender Women's Memoirs You Need To Read Now. How Coming Out to My Mother Taught Me the Complexity of Black Women’s Love - BGD. By Helen McDonald No one warned me that when I came out, it would provoke a disaster of restorative Black female love. The hardest part was recognizing that no matter how much I love my mother, I had to break her heart to heal my own. The preciousness of our relationship arose from its fragility. It had always contained traces of antagonism, not because my mom was cruel but because I saw her life as the site of a patriarchal battleground, designed for men like my father to conquer and dominate.

She was always the example my father used to demonstrate what was acceptable, submissive female behavior when he was policing my own assertive and “boyish” nature. Despite the respect and love that matured in our mother-daughter relationship over time, when I came out to my mother, we found ourselves in a battle neither of us wanted to fight. Two years ago, in the midst of a deep depression, I chose to live out my truth as a gay woman.

3 Ways the Gay Rights Agenda™ Has Perpetuated Oppression. This past decade, we’ve witnessed quite a few advancements for gay rights in the US: anti-homophobic hate crimes legislation, the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, and nationwide marriage equality, to name a few. Liberal media often paints these stories as victories — in which the “LGBT community” has won some rights and therefore the violence and stigma against our communities has lessened. These are supposed to be moments in history that we — those of us who are queer and trans and allies — are supposed to be celebrating. But behind every rainbow flag, there’s a pot of Goldman Sachs (and a conservative agenda). Rather than victories, several moments in recent history of the gay movement have been huge losses.

The gay rights movement has won rights and recognition that largely serve the interests of white, wealthy cisgender gay men to the detriment of poor queers and queer people of color, and to the detriment of racial and economic justice more generally. “Equality” is not liberation. 1. 2. The worst assimilation of all: How modern-day drag hurts trans women and achieves little or nothing of value. 1. A many-sided debate It’s been almost two weeks since the publication of our open letter regarding Calpernia Addams and Andrea James, and I feel it’s had quite a useful impact. My goal in this was to present a loud, powerful, and broad-based protest against what would otherwise be unopposed transphobia by two women who are perceived as community “leaders”.

And this chorus of opposition consists of none other than those most affected by this: trans women and transfeminine people ourselves. I’m very pleased that this has helped to force a long-simmering and much-needed conversation about the continuing tensions between trans women, drag queens, and the cis people who mistakenly conflate these two groups. That conversation has since elicited a variety of reactions: RuPaul’s Drag Race agreed to discontinue using the word “shemale”, as previously featured in their “Female or Shemale” and “You’ve Got She-Mail” segments. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Not Calpernia Addams. #nomakeup #nofilter 6. 7. Why has drag escaped critique from feminists and the LGBTQ community? Moving Beyond “Lesbian Bed Death” And Bridging The Libido Gap. Okay, are y’all ready for the longest sex question I’ve ever answered? Because this one’s a doozy. Normally we edit the questions down to a nice size, but there’s a lot going on here and I think all of it’s valuable.

So we’re publishing most of this question, almost intact: I have been in a relationship with a bisexual girl for more than 10 months. In February 2013, she went for an operation to remove a couple of cysts in her womb and she has been put on the mini-pill ever since. I definitely have a higher libido than she does and here, I’m not sure if it is because she has had sex with men or women (I’m not her first girl) who have been demanding and have forced themselves on her.

I do not want to jeopardize the relationship—I know sex isn’t everything but I don’t feel the intimacy with her. Alrighty, dear reader. I want to start, though, by commending you for not calling this lesbian bed death. Medications Make A Difference Her Body Is, In Fact, Hers The Price Of Admission Or! Or! Four Things Cis People Forget  I appreciate all the cis people in my life who have worked hard to learn about trans issues and become better allies to me and people like me. Despite their sincerity and hard work, there are a few habits that are so deeply engrained into our culture that I notice cis people have trouble remembering to step out of them. So I put together a list of a few things I notice my cis friends forgetting, either out of ignorance or culturally learned habit, in the hopes that it will help us move forward into a more respectful and inclusive world. 1. Not everyone you meet is cis. In my experience, cis people tend to assume that they will be able to tell that someone is trans — that we will look a certain way, with certain “in-between” characteristics that will give us away.

This assumption can be harmful in numerous ways. Some trans people “pass” as cis, but not all trans people pass, or pass all the time. 2. Even as a trans person, I mess this up. 3. 4. Ask what your friends prefer. Works Cited. You Need Help: Two Bottoms, One Relationship. Feature image via shutterstock Welcome to You Need Help! Where you’ve got a problem and yo, we solve it. Or we at least try. Q: A friend and I started seeing each other this summer when a friendly one-on-one camping trip turned hot and heavy real quick.

One thing though. How can I and/or my romantifriend move past our shynesses to enact what we really want, and still gain confidence and practice consent? Thanks for helping me develop my flexi-toppiness, Queer, Quiet, and Quivering A: Hi Queer, Quiet, and Quivering! First of all, I’m excited both of you are learning in your new relationship. It seems like there are two issues here: shyness about initiating actual sexytimes, and you both being bottoms. If you both have sad/bad histories, unlearning bad habits from your pasts and practicing consent is important and I’m glad you’re doing it. For example, if you want your partner to whip you around, make sure they know that. The other issue is that you’re both bottoms. Discussion will be key.

Drag Culture Hurts the Transgender Community. There has been a longstanding tension between the drag community and the transgender community. The most recent flare-up comes from RuPaul (again) for using the word "shemale" prominently in a contest on the sixth season premier episode of Drag Race. What makes this even more awkward is that GLAAD had been promoting this episode. RuPaul has been problematic for the transgender community in the past when defending the use of the word "tranny," as well as saying that the only difference between a drag queen and a transsexual is "$25,000 and a good surgeon.

" In all of these kerfuffles, though, the pushback against the transgender community is usually something along the lines of "you're being too sensitive," "you people can't take a joke," that some transgender people got a start in drag culture, or that drag culture is really a good thing because it challenges the gender binary. However, these are only the "pros. " From this perspective, the equation isn't even close. The trans community needs to understand its differences. “Hurt people hurt people.” Laverne Cox quoted the line in her keynote address at the 2014 Trans 100 Live Event as she spoke to the need for healing in the community. For groups defined, at least in part, by shared experiences of oppression, there is an unspoken, perhaps even unconscious, belief in freedom from such oppression in spaces created or dominated by the community itself.

When hurt occurs there it has an extra layer of betrayal and violation. Likewise, when someone is accused of such hurt it is a shock to their very identity. How can I, as an oppressed person, oppress another? Disbelief is often followed by emboldened conviction. These common dynamics have been playing out publicly in a corner of the transgender community right now. It began with a series of escalating op-eds in the Huffington Post and the Advocate. Before looking at these issues closely, it should first be noted that this is possibly the whitest "controversy" to achieve such a scale of attention. Trans* Women Are Not Drag Queens. Gay Men Just Don't Understand Transwomen. Think trans women are simply gay men, who refuse to accept that they are gay. So we take hormones and "mutilate" ourselves to mimic women and buy vaginas to justify having sex with a man.

And some gay men go positively bonkers when they see trans women with handsome, worthwhile men. I remember reading where southern writer, William Faulkner-- author of such short stories as A ROSE FOR EMILY, DRY SEPTEMBER, to name a few--said that it was the responsibility of white people to bring black people along, to teach Negroes the importance of manners and education so they could comport themselves effectively and prosper in a democratic society. I don't know when Faulkner uttered these bothersome words because many (blacks) had no chance of prospering or receiving adequate education prior to the Civil Rights struggle. But I digress. Trans women should take Mr. Faulkner's advice and tweak it to meet our needs. Ellen Degeneres Called 'Transphobic' After Liza Minnelli Oscars Joke. Whipping Girl: a few thoughts on drag, trans women, and subversivism. 5 things you NEED to know before you date a trans woman! — Gender 2.0.

The Quiet Clash Between Transgender Women And Drag Queens. Gay Men Just Don't Understand Transwomen. Caitlyn Jenner Prays With Rabidly Anti-LGBT Pastor During Visit To Houston - VIDEO. Solidarity 201: Strategies For Cisgender Folks Committed to Gender Justice. Holigay Gift Guide 2015: Movies, Books, Music & Media with Quality Trans Representation. 'Who's the Man?': Heteronormativity and Queer Relationships. Here's What Is (And Isn't) Working in Men's Work on College Campuses. 10 Things Trans Activists and Allies NEED to Remember That Have Nothing to Do With Caitlyn Jenner. 3 Ways White Cis Gay Men Can Do Better for the LGBTQIA+ Movement.

13 Myths And Misconceptions About Trans Women. 5 Things Being in a Femme-Butch Relationship Has Taught Me About Privilege. A trans woman's reply to Germaine Greer. Asexuality and Race | The Thinking Asexual. 30+ Examples of Cisgender Privilege. Obama Administration Supports Transgender Student In Federal Appeals Court. Silencing the Screaming Queens: Roland Emmerich's 'Stonewall' and the Erasure of Queer Rage | Colin Walmsley.

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