The Perfect Brunch Sandwich. Sandwich Monday: The Jim Shoe. The Chicago sandwich containing gyro meat, roast beef and corned beef goes by many names. This is one of many ways in which it's like the devil, and Sean Combs. People call it the Gym Shoe, the Jim Shoe or the Jim Shoo. Ian: With a name this unappetizing, the sandwich had no choice but to be so delicious no one would mess with it. It's like A Boy Named Shoe. Blythe: I thought I'd need my Reebok Stomach Pumps for this. Jim Shoe, or the world's most delicious Sarlacc? Itoggle caption NPR Jim Shoe, or the world's most delicious Sarlacc? We went out to Sony's Submarine to find one. Miles: I wish this had been the shoe of choice during my middle-school years. Blythe: I feel like a fat Carrie Bradshaw right now. Ian: I never get this right — so it's pronounced "yee-roh" and "yastrointestinal distress," right?
This is what it looks like when J.J. This is what it looks like when J.J. Blythe: Kobe wears Kobes, Jordan wore Jordans and Jim, that guy who insists on "shirts" vs. Sandwich Monday: The Famous St. Paul Sandwich (of St. Louis) This exists. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR Since Sandwich Monday began, certain sandwiches have been our white whales: the Hippogriff Burger, a Reuben signed by J.D.
Salinger, an Actual White Whale sandwich. Also, the mysterious St.Paul sandwich, native to St. Miles: This is the same sandwich my Model U.N. group made the first time we all got high together. Ian: This really comes from the "These Are The Only Things I Had In My Fridge" school of cooking. Ian attempts to process how something so disturbing could be so delicious. Ian attempts to process how something so disturbing could be so delicious. Miles picked a couple up from Delmar Chop Suey in St.
Ian: It's really good. Miles: They coat the sandwich in mayonnaise so it slides down your throat before you can process what it tastes like. Peter: You know how this got its name? This picture is better if you imagine opera coming out of Peter's mouth when you look at it. Robert: I always wondered how St. Sandwich Monday: The Egg Rollie. Ever since Neanderthal man first cooked mammoth eggs over a fire, we've been looking for newer and better ways to cook eggs. Finally, the Egg Rollie is here. Take a second to watch the video above, then recoil in horror, then read our review. Ian: "EGG-cellent! " I love the way it "EGG-scretes" the eggs!
Miles: Say what you will, this is significantly more successful than the time I tried to make an omelet in my toaster. Eva: You should see the chicken this came out of. It emerges. Itoggle caption NPR It is really amazing to watch it work. Ian: It's like a missile silo for World War Egg. Miles: We really should've known something was up when every recipe in the cookbook started, "Cook eggs in something other than the Rollie. " Robert: Oh, look what it says on the box: "Winner of the Most Likely To Maintain Its Shape Through Your Entire Digestive Tract Award.
" Eva does not like it. Eva does not like it. In progress. Eva: Now I know what to eat with my tube toast every morning. Robert tries it. Sandwich Monday: The Land, Sea And Air Burger : Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me! The McDonald's Land, Sea and Air Burger: a chicken patty, a beef patty, and a Filet O' Fish patty on a single bun. It's on the McDonald's Secret Menu, not because it's exclusive, not even because they're ashamed of it, but because they're protecting us. Eva: I can't tell which meat is which. Ian: Yeah, it's hard to tell what my body is violently rejecting.
Ian is disturbed. Itoggle caption NPR Ian: It's getting pretty crowded in the Occupy Sesame Seed Bun Protest. Mike: I believe this sandwich was prophesied in the bible. Mike: This sandwich needs Grimace Meat. Ian: The Land, Sea, Air, and Space Burger. Robert: Just as the various branches of the Armed Forces are charged with defending our liberty, these three McDonalds meats are there to preserve our obesity. The raw materials. Ian: I was hoping eating this would give me the powers of each of the animals. Mike: You know, Rick Perry tried making this sandwich, but kept forgetting the Department of McChicken. Sandwich Monday: We're Full. Because of the limited structural integrity of The Saltwich, Robert had to employ the Butterfly Grip in 2013. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR Because of the limited structural integrity of The Saltwich, Robert had to employ the Butterfly Grip in 2013.
In 2010, we started eating sandwiches. Five years later, we are officially full. The nine-patty T-Rex Burger helped Peter realize in 2013 that he'd been eating underpattied burgers his whole life. The nine-patty T-Rex Burger helped Peter realize in 2013 that he'd been eating underpattied burgers his whole life. There are many reasons, but mostly it's because Miles knows a guy who knows a guy who says he can replace all of our blood with gorilla plasma and this will undo everything we've done to our bodies since the series began, but he only works on Mondays. We'll still surface to talk about new, disgusting sandwiches (and new, disgusting other things that we will never admit are not sandwiches) when they come along. Sandwich Monday: The Ignatius R. No mouths were harmed in the eating of this sandwich. Except Eva's â she wants Worker's Comp for a bad case of Sandwich Jaw. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR No mouths were harmed in the eating of this sandwich.
Except Eva's â she wants Worker's Comp for a bad case of Sandwich Jaw. It's -16 degrees today here in Chicago, which for many of us has triggered hibernation mode. The ingredient list: fried chicken, cold hickory-smoked sirloin, applewood bacon, fresh mozzarella, lettuce, Carolina vinegar, fried shrimp, fried green tomato, mortadella, country ham, pickled okra, American cheese, lettuce, tomato, and Southwest mayo on a potato bun.
Ian: I couldn't get through that whole ingredient list, but I ate the Clif's Notes. Eva: These are all the things Vogue magazine advised me to eat as part of my New Year's diet! Eva is not using this as her new profile pic, but the Ignatius R is definitely posting it on SandwichBook. Robert is forced to use the unorthodox "Skokie Spiral Grip. " We eat a bacon cheeseburger on two monte cristo sandwiches. : Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me! We all know the classic fictional sandwiches: the unicorn melt, the möbius five dollar footlong (it's technically more of a wrap). But there are also nonfictional sandwiches invented by fictional characters, and that's what we're trying today. Kevin Butler, the man, is the guy in the PS3 ads.
And the Kevin Butler sandwich is a bacon double cheeseburger on two deep-fried monte cristo sandwiches. Mike: You really have to compress it to get it into your mouth. Peter: Mike, you squeezed it so hard you made a Meat Diamond. Still under construction, yet still eight times bigger than the average sandwich. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR Still under construction, yet still eight times bigger than the average sandwich. Peter: So this was invented by a video game guy? Mike: Yeah, I think if you eat it you get an extra life. Ian: It's like that mushroom Mario eats that doesn't so much make him Super as Fatter.
Ian holds the bread, or what some people call "a month's worth of food. " Sandwich Monday: Defining 'Sandwich' : Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me! Many of you have rightfully noted that the various abominations we eat on Mondays do not always fit into the traditional definition of "sandwich. " I'd like to share our philosophy on this matter. For a long time, we've used The Neuhaus Rule: a sandwich is defined as protein encased in bread product. This definition allows us to explore the widest possible wasteland of cuisine. But for the few foods that don't fit under The Neuhaus Rule, we also observe The Sandwich Draft Principle. We feel that if a food doesn't belong to any other food category (spoons made of chicken, 7-11 Chicken Batons), we can draft it onto the Sandwich Team. If you see through these definitions as the weak rationalizations they most certainly are, or if you've got your own definition, let us know.
Sandwich Monday: Deep-Fried Cheese Curds. Deep-fried cheese curds. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR Deep-fried cheese curds. Whenever people from the edges of the country come to visit me in the Midwest, I don't let them leave until they have tried deep-fried cheese curds. If you're not familiar with them, cheese curds are a byproduct of the cheddar cheese-making process, and "deep frying" is a method by which anything is made into a better version of itself. You can find deep-fried cheese curds all over the states surrounding Wisconsin. But today we're eating the exceptional beer-battered ones from Farmhouse in Chicago. Peter: Some say that the sweet potato is nature's perfect food, because it's packed with vitamins. Eva: Whoever invented these should win an Oscar. Robert is transfixed. Robert is transfixed.
Miles: No one let the cheese curds know that I brought a salad for lunch — I don't want to look like a nerd in front of them. Jeanette: I appreciate any food item that oils my cuticles as I eat. Sistine Chapel close-up. Sandwich Monday: Breakfast In A Tin. Contains egg nugget. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR [Sandwich Monday note: Gillian is our resident British Person.] Americans often look upon British food as bland and stodgy, so for this week's Sandwich Monday, I decided to prove everyone wrong with my offer of Hunger Breaks All Day Breakfast: a can of baked beans, sausage, bacon and "egg nuggets.
" Miles: If we had two of these and a bit of string, we could make the world's most revolting telephone. Gillian: Oh, it tastes like home! Mike: Did you grow up in a boxcar? Ian detects egg nugget. Ian detects egg nugget. Miles: What came first, the egg nugget or the chicken nugget? Ann: I found this to be "quite lovely," actually. Peter: It's got everything you need for a classic British breakfast. Ann is shocked by the mind-blowing flavor of egg nugget. Ann is shocked by the mind-blowing flavor of egg nugget. Robert: It says "all day breakfast" but really, what are the chances of this being consumed any other time than 3 a.m.? Sandwich Monday: Pizza-Flavored Energy Paste. We apologize to pizza. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR We apologize to pizza. Traditionally, the liquified foods marathoners choke down in the middle of a race have been limited to some pretty basic flavors: lemon-lime gel, vanilla goo, chocolate mystery substance.
No more! Clif has introduced pizza-flavored energy paste. We tried it while competing together in an ultramarathon this weekend (this entire sentence is a lie). Ian: It's like an IV bag for someone suffering from too much happiness. Eva: If my wisdom teeth grow back and I have to get them removed again, I won't have to take a break from pizza this time. Robert looks before he tastes. Robert looks before he tastes. Robert: Finally, a cure for the Passover pizza craving I suffer from every year! To be fair, this stuff is designed for endurance athletes. Eva: This'll be great for refueling during my couch triathlon! Ann: I'm not a marathoner, but I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to induce vomiting while running. This is food. Sandwich Monday: The Passover Sandwich. In the time of Exodus, the Hebrews had to travel the desert without reading material. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR In the time of Exodus, the Hebrews had to travel the desert without reading material.
Editor's Note: This story was originally published in April 2014. Why is this Sandwich Monday different from all other Sandwich Mondays? It's not the Seder meal, but what I might have brought to school for lunch back in the 1970s, when the affluent Jews of suburban New Jersey ate tasteless food to remind themselves that thousands of years ago, they didn't have nice professional jobs like being a lawyer, or maybe a CPA.
So what's the sandwich? Peter: Eat, everybody. Seth: If I was the Red Sea, and Moses tried to get me to eat this, I would totally part. Seth bites down onto 5,000 years of suffering. Seth bites down onto 5,000 years of suffering. Peter: Opening this jar of gefilte fish reminded me of my beloved grandmother Rose Scholnick opening a jar of gefilte fish. Ann: Yes. Sandwich Monday: Bone-In Pork Chop Sandwich. There are dangerous sandwiches out there: the Wendy's Sharpened Chicken Classic, the McRib that's always sending you emails with questionable attachments. But they pale in comparison to the famous pork chop sandwich from Jim's Original in Chicago: Jim leaves the bone in.
Eva: The bone also serves as a useful sandwich handle. Miles: Eating a bone-in sandwich is the lazy person's equivalent of free-climbing a mountain. The danger just adds to the rush. Ian: Brackium Emendo! After this photo was taken, Robert chewed on his bone for hours. Itoggle caption NPR After this photo was taken, Robert chewed on his bone for hours. Eva: Are we sure the bone wasn't put there by a disgruntled employee? Jeanette: I get scared just thinking about the damage that bone could cause me if I ate this as a late-night drunk meal. Ian: Yeah. Miles: If you eat enough of these, you can reconstruct the pig. The bone stays in, the grease goes everywhere. The bone stays in, the grease goes everywhere. Sandwich Monday: Pizza-Flavored Salad Dressing.
Funagrette combines "funag" with "vinaigrette. " NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR Funagrette combines "funag" with "vinaigrette. " After years of doing Sandwich Monday, we've decided to try a salad. In order to make the transition easier for everyone, we're eating it with "Cheesy Pizza" Flavored Salad Dressing from Chef Kidd's "Funagrette. " That last paragraph is a lie. Ian: "Funagrette" is also a good name for a product that gets kids to try cigarettes. Jeanette: I never thought a salad could make me feel so bad about my eating habits. Miles: This product is under the false impression that what kids hate most about salad is the dressing, when in fact what kids hate most about salad is salad.
This is the face Peter makes when he tastes pizza salad dressing, or when you tell him Antiques Roadshow spoilers. This is the face Peter makes when he tastes pizza salad dressing, or when you tell him Antiques Roadshow spoilers. Eva: I like to fold my salad in half and eat it with my hands. Sandwich Monday: The Funnel Cake Corn Dog. Like five fat, delicious fingers. NPR hide caption itoggle caption NPR Like five fat, delicious fingers. When the corn dog was discovered in an Iowa cave in the 1950s, explorers dated it at roughly 40,000 years old. Its recipe has gone largely unchanged since then, though few makers use real glyptodon meat anymore.
Recently, though, the dog has had an evolutionary transformation. Eva: Time to reinforce the roller coaster. Peter: This is a travesty. Ian's entire childhood flashes before his eyes. Ian's entire childhood flashes before his eyes. Ian: You know, if you pronounce it "fennel cake" you feel a lot better about yourself. It's slightly sweeter than a traditional corn dog, but it's not as drastically different as we would have liked.
Ian: It's basically a wiener that was hanging out at a bar and now its sweater smells like secondhand cake. Mike: Are we sure that corn dogs aren't just regular hot dogs that are molting? (The verdict: We wouldn't choose this over the traditional corn dog.
Sandwich Monday: Little Caesars' Bacon-Wrapped Crust Pizza. Sandwich Monday: Meow Parlour. Sandwich Monday: Girl Scout Cookie Coffeemate. Double Down Hot Dogs Exist. Yes, KFC Has Actually Gone There. Sandwich Monday: The White Castle Veggie Slider. Sandwich Monday: The Pretzel Dog. Sandwich Monday: The 'Shroom Burger From Shake Shack. Sandwich Monday: Doritos Loaded. Sandwich Monday: Taco Bell Dessert Nachos. Sandwich Monday: The Thanksgiving Hot Durkey. Sandwich Monday: Papa John's Frito Chili Pizza. Sandwich Monday: The Baco. Sandwich (Replacement) Monday: Soylent. Sandwich Monday: The Primanti Bros. Pitts-burger. Sandwich Monday: PB&J Balls. Sandwich Monday: The Pizza Cake. Sandwich Monday: The Abe Lincoln.