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Self-compassion - A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself

Self-compassion - A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself

To Clear Negative Thoughts, Physically Throw Them Away: Study Bothered by negative thoughts? Clearing your mind of them could be as simple as writing them down and physically throwing them away, according to a new study, published in the journal Psychological Science. "At some level, it can sound silly. But we found that it really works -- by physically throwing away or protecting your thoughts, you influence how you end up using those thoughts," study researcher Richard Petty, of Ohio State University, said in a statement. "Merely imagining engaging in these actions has no effect." Petty conducted the study along with Spanish researchers from the Universidad Autónoma de Madrid. After writing down these thoughts, all of them were asked to read them back over and think about them. Researchers found that for the students who were not asked to throw away their written thoughts on their self-body image, what they had written down seemed to have an effect on how they rated their body image afterward. Also on HuffPost:

Home Unusual Experiment Gives People a Third Arm Arvid Guterstam, a doctoral student, conducts experiments aimed at tricking the brain into believing the body has three arms. If you’ve ever felt like you needed an extra hand around the house, a bizarre new study may have found a way to make it possible. Researchers at the Karolinska Institute in Stockholm conducted an unusual experiment aimed at creating the illusion — and physical sensation — of having a third arm. In five separate laboratory experiments, 154 volunteers were seated with their hands on a table and a rubber arm was placed next to their right arm. A sheet covered their shoulders and elbows, creating the illusion that the person had three arms. The scientists then gently brushed the real and fake hands. In one part of the experiment, both the real hands were “threatened” with a knife after the brushing exercise. Mr. Mr. “The fact that it does work tells us something very deep about how our perceptual systems operate,’’ he wrote in an e-mail.

If You Want A Certain Culture, Then Act That Way If you want a certain culture, then act that way. Here’s a nice little nugget of wisdom from one of our favourite organisational thought leaders at the moment, Henry Cloud. The message is simple. If you want a certain culture, then do more of that deed. A culture is powerful. It has the ability to help us thrive or suck the life out of us. Hat tip to Sonja Blingaut for finding this. Meditation and Mindfulness Mindfulness is not thinking, interpreting, or evaluating; it is an awareness of perception. It is a nonjudgmental quality of mind which does not anticipate the future or reflect back on the past. Any activity can be done with mindfulness. Talking on the telephone, cleaning your home, driving, working, and exercising can all be incorporated into a mindfulness practice. Throughout the day, inwardly pause and become very aware of where you are, what you are doing, and how you are feeling. When mindfulness is the primary tool of meditation, the awareness that we apply to our breath (or to whatever our object–or focus–of meditation is, such as a word, image, sound, or physical sensation to which we return our attention after becoming distracted) can be expanded to include all physical and mental processes so that we may become more mindful of our thoughts and actions. It is commonly thought that meditators hope to stop all thoughts and rest their minds in thoughtless peace. by Steven Smith

When Democracy Weakens While millions of ordinary Americans are struggling with unemployment and declining standards of living, the levers of real power have been all but completely commandeered by the financial and corporate elite. It doesn’t really matter what ordinary people want. The wealthy call the tune, and the politicians dance. So what we get in this democracy of ours are astounding and increasingly obscene tax breaks and other windfall benefits for the wealthiest, while the bought-and-paid-for politicians hack away at essential public services and the social safety net, saying we can’t afford them. The poor, who are suffering from an all-out depression, are never heard from. In an Op-Ed article in The Times at the end of January, Senator John Kerry said that the Egyptian people “have made clear they will settle for nothing less than greater democracy and more economic opportunities.” When the game is rigged in your favor, you win.

7 Crucial Things You Need To Be Honest About Honesty is the best policy, right? But we’re all guilty of telling “little white lies” sometimes. Regardless, there are certain things in life it’s important to be honest about. Here are 7 of them. Your guilty pleasures. Everyone has a guilty pleasure or two. Your struggles. The sooner you honestly assess the things you’re struggling with, the sooner you can find ways to make your life better. Your free time. How do you spend your free time? Your health. If you think eating junk food all day and not exercising is going to lead to a fulfilling life, guess again. Your work. It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day monotony of working life. Your family. You can’t pick your family, which means you’re stuck with the one you have. Your habits. One of the biggest mistakes I see people make is they focus too much on the expected outcome rather than changing the underlying behavior. When did being productive get so complicated?

The Tree of Contemplative Practices The Tree illustrates some of the contemplative practices currently in use in secular organizational and academic settings. This is not intended to be a comprehensive list. Below the Tree you will find links to descriptions of many of these practices as well as a more in-depth description of the Tree and image files for downloading. Some of the practices on the tree link to further information–either on our website, or on Wikipedia. © The Center for Contemplative Mind in Society Concept & design by Maia Duerr; illustration by Carrie Bergman Understanding the Tree On the Tree of Contemplative Practices, the roots symbolize the two intentions that are the foundation of all contemplative practices. The branches represent different groupings of practices. Because this illustration cannot possibly include all contemplative practices, we offer a free download of a blank Tree that you can customize to include your own practices. Downloading and Reprinting the Tree For printing:

The Myth of Joyful Parenthood Raising children is hard, and any parent who says differently is lying. Parenting is emotionally and intellectually draining, and it often requires professional sacrifice and serious financial hardship. Kids are needy and demanding from the moment of their birth to… well, forever. Don’t get me wrong. I love my children dearly, and can’t imagine my life without them. How do we square this jarring contradiction? In the jargon of the field, this is called “cognitive dissonance” — the psychological mechanism we all use to justify our choices and beliefs and preserve our self-esteem. They recruited 80 fathers and mothers, each parent with at least one child under age 18. Then the scientists gave the parents a psychological test designed to measure how much they idealized parenting: Did they agree strongly (or not) that there is nothing more rewarding than raising a child? Eibach and Mock were testing a couple ideas. And that’s what they found, with a slight twist. The results were clear.

How to Rewire Your Brain to Be More Kind Toward Others Kindness is the state of caring about other people’s well-being and taking action to help make other people’s lives better and happier. It is a social glue that allows us to connect with others and build meaningful relationships with them When someone does something kind for us, we like them more and we want to cooperate with them more. When we do something kind for someone, we earn their trust and respect, and we feel better about ourselves for being a good person. Kindness is a reciprocal relationship. The more we practice kindness, the easier it is. Every thought and action we do fires neurons in our brain. Here are scientifically supported ways we can increase our kindness toward others. Get your intentions right Having good intentions is the first step toward being kinder toward others and building positive relationships with them. Cultivating the right attitude about others is often necessary before we start acting in kinder ways. See from the other person’s perspective

"Be the Change" - His Holiness the Dalai Lama at Inverness, Scotland

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