How to Rewire Your Brain to Be More Kind Toward Others
Kindness is the state of caring about other people’s well-being and taking action to help make other people’s lives better and happier. It is a social glue that allows us to connect with others and build meaningful relationships with them When someone does something kind for us, we like them more and we want to cooperate with them more. When we do something kind for someone, we earn their trust and respect, and we feel better about ourselves for being a good person. Kindness is a reciprocal relationship. It becomes a cycle that strengthens our bond with friends, family, lovers, coworkers, and acquaintances. The more we practice kindness, the easier it is. Every thought and action we do fires neurons in our brain. Here are scientifically supported ways we can increase our kindness toward others. Get your intentions right Having good intentions is the first step toward being kinder toward others and building positive relationships with them. See from the other person’s perspective
healthy vs toxic love
7 Crucial Things You Need To Be Honest About
Honesty is the best policy, right? But we’re all guilty of telling “little white lies” sometimes. Regardless, there are certain things in life it’s important to be honest about. Here are 7 of them. Your guilty pleasures. Everyone has a guilty pleasure or two. Your struggles. The sooner you honestly assess the things you’re struggling with, the sooner you can find ways to make your life better. Your free time. How do you spend your free time? Your health. If you think eating junk food all day and not exercising is going to lead to a fulfilling life, guess again. Your work. It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day monotony of working life. Your family. You can’t pick your family, which means you’re stuck with the one you have. Your habits. One of the biggest mistakes I see people make is they focus too much on the expected outcome rather than changing the underlying behavior. When did being productive get so complicated?
Why "Nice Guys" are often such LOSERS
You hear it all the time: "He was such a NICE Guy, and she's such a Heartless Bitch for dumping him." I get letters from self-professed Nice Guys, complaining that women must WANT to be treated like shit, because THEY, the "Nice Guy" have failed repeatedly in relationships. This is akin to the false logic that "Whales are mammals. Whales live in the sea. If you have one bad relationship after another, the only common denominator is YOU. What's wrong with Nice Guys? Nice Guys exude insecurity -- a big red target for the predators of the world. Self-confident, caring, decent-hearted women find "Nice Guys" to be too clingy, self-abasing, and insecure. Nice Guys go overboard. They are so desperate to please that they put aside their own needs, and place the object of their desire on a pedestal. They cling to her, and want to be "one" with her for fear that if she is out of sight, she may disappear or become attracted to someone else. Nice Guys are always asking HER to make the decisions.
If You Want A Certain Culture, Then Act That Way
If you want a certain culture, then act that way. Here’s a nice little nugget of wisdom from one of our favourite organisational thought leaders at the moment, Henry Cloud. The message is simple. If you want a certain culture, then do more of that deed. A culture is powerful. Hat tip to Sonja Blingaut for finding this.
Alluring, difficult woman seeks stable and assertive man
I am in search of a patient, assertive, and attractive man to aid me in my quest for self-improvement. These qualities are non-negotiable and the explanation is as follows. After two intense failed relationships, {both which, in retrospect, were almost completely my fault but I was able to successfully manipulate things so as to make each man believe they were in the wrong} I have spent a lot of time thinking about who I am and I have isolated several personality traits that make it somewhat difficult for a normal person to have a relationship with me. I am looking for a man who is secure enough in himself to tolerate our exciting lifestyle {a background or degree in psychology is a plus.} I am determined to find a healthier way of approaching things, as I never want to ruin anyone's life ever again. Some things you should know: *I have a major 'Daddy' complex. *I will never trust you. *I have no communication skills. *I have an addictive personality. *I am a cold and unemotional bitch.
Self-compassion - A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself
So, you're telling me we should just be friends?
OK, so here's the story. I'm a 28 year old guy living in the Midwest. I've had one romantic relationship in my life, and that ended very badly in 2005 (she got abusive when we broke up, told all my secrets to whoever would listen, etc.) Prior to that, I really didn't have the confidence to approach women due to a weight problem and not having any money in college. I had a lot of crushes on women before my relationship in 2005, but I just never acted upon it because of self-confidence issues. Now I find myself in a weird place. I think my views about relationships are all wrong. Compounding this fact is that I really enjoy misogynist entertainment. I know I should likely go to therapy, but are there any other resources out there I could consult to help me begin to get over these views? My e-mail is askmefi at yahoo dot com if you would like additional info of any kind from me.
To Clear Negative Thoughts, Physically Throw Them Away: Study
Bothered by negative thoughts? Clearing your mind of them could be as simple as writing them down and physically throwing them away, according to a new study, published in the journal Psychological Science. "At some level, it can sound silly. But we found that it really works -- by physically throwing away or protecting your thoughts, you influence how you end up using those thoughts," study researcher Richard Petty, of Ohio State University, said in a statement. Petty conducted the study along with Spanish researchers from the Universidad Autónoma de Madrid. After writing down these thoughts, all of them were asked to read them back over and think about them. Researchers found that for the students who were not asked to throw away their written thoughts on their self-body image, what they had written down seemed to have an effect on how they rated their body image afterward. Also on HuffPost:
Please help me silence my nosy relatives and friends
I've recently turned 28, and am still unmarried. For various reasons, I would prefer to stay single. However, my extended family has other ideas I'm originally from the Indian Subcontinent, so family is a big part of my life. The real reason I have no desire to get married is because I have not seen very many happy marriages in my life. I obviously don't want to tell my family any of this, but still want to politely communicate that it will be a long while before I'll be married, if at all. Thanks for any help you can offer, MeFi'ers.
