Remembering Steve Jobs Some paradoxes - an anthology im a lady...pt 1 251 170 107 126 124 140 91 212 194 376 209 267 176 318 198 143 200 105 438 144 214 63 78 177 74 131 171 75 173 100 150 96 71 202 100 160 195 146 90 100 85 67 251 125 99 94 112 76 75 146 50 73 60 212 210 61 96 167 149 100 96 99 199 76 125 90 203 99 139 56 142 98 215 95 85 35 35 339 210 126 111 228 76 134 86 89 461 95 74 42 72 66 53 86 86 52 80 48 Deep thoughts. Anti-vaccine logic. Thought of the week at Microsoft How I feel standing vs sitting. How dare you... I'm messing with you! This is how I proposed to my girlfriend - she said yes! Shakespeare Insult Kit Shakespeare Insult Kit Since 1996, the origin of this kit was listed as anonymous. It came to me on a piece of paper in the 90's with no attribution, and I thought it would make a cool web page. Combine one word from each of the three columns below, prefaced with "Thou": My additions: cullionly whoreson knave fusty malmsey-nosed blind-worm caluminous rampallian popinjay wimpled lily-livered scullian burly-boned scurvy-valiant jolt-head misbegotten brazen-faced malcontent odiferous unwash'd devil-monk poisonous bunch-back'd toad fishified leaden-footed rascal Wart-necked muddy-mettled Basket-Cockle pigeon-liver'd scale-sided Back to the insulter. Chris Seidel
101 Short Stories that Will Leave You Smiling, Crying and Thinking post written by: Marc Chernoff Email Since its inception eighteen months ago, our sister site Makes Me Think (MMT) has truly evolved into a remarkable online community. As stated on the MMT About page, sometimes the most random everyday encounters force us to stop and rethink the truths and perceptions we have ingrained in our minds. I believe the 101 stories listed below perfectly fulfill that description. What do you think? Homer Simpson Quotes D'oh! I hate Traffic. The band AND the phenomenon! Oh, why do my actions have consequences? I love going to aquatic parks. Thank goodness it's TGIF! Marge, I thought this was an inocuous lunch, but it's become terribly ocuous! When will I learn? Bingo! Ah, alcohol. What's the point of going out? Lisa, vampires are make believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos. Save me, Jeebus! Facts are meaningless - you could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true! I'm not impressed easily. Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back, unless your tears smell like dog food. I don't hate your mother, I just won't be sad when she dies. How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Who are you? Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You/re making a scene'. I'm a 'Spalding Gray' in a 'Rick Dees' world. Donuts...is there anything they can't do? Trying is the first step toward failure. Because they're stupid, that's why. That's it! Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. English?
101 Simple Truths We Often Forget post written by: Marc Chernoff Email It‘s not where we stand but in what direction we are moving. Sometimes we find ourselves running in place, struggling to get ahead simply because we forget to address some of the simple truths that govern our potential to make progress. So here’s a quick reminder: The acquisition of knowledge doesn’t mean you’re growing. Photo by: Alexander Steinhof If you enjoyed this article, check out our new best-selling book. And get inspiring life tips and quotes in your inbox (it's free)...
ERUDITE CONCEPTS If you're not familiar with the work of Boswell D. Rabbitsmith, he's the famous erudite scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates." His mind sees things differently than most of us do, to our amazement and amusement. Here are some of his gems: (He also makes his living as a comedian by the name of Steve Wright....) 1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. 2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back. 3 - Half the people you know are below average. 4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. 5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot. 6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good. 7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. 8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain. 9 - All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand. 10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. 12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Shake the Dust – This one is for you A poem that will shake you… “Do not let one moment go by that doesn’t remind you that your heart beats 900 times a day, and there are enough gallons of blood to make everyone of you oceans” ~ Anis Mojgani In the back of a large room at Powel’s Bookstore I was half-heartedly listening to a poet I had never heard of. I was checking my email off my phone and wondering what I would scrounge up for dinner. And slowly, like he was lifting my chin up with one finger from my stressed and distracted world, he brought me back. It’s so easy to get wrapped up and stressed about the day to day, and there are times when I have to stop and remember to breath deeply and… shake the dust. Thank you Anis. Fan elephant’s best stories here or here or here. About Allie Bombach Living in her restored 1970 Airstream, Allie recently relocated to Portland, Oregon where she works as a freelance videographer and filmmaker for the outdoor industry. If you liked this, you might like these: