background preloader

How not to say the wrong thing

How not to say the wrong thing
(Illustration by Wes Bausmith…) When Susan had breast cancer, we heard a lot of lame remarks, but our favorite came from one of Susan's colleagues. She wanted, she needed, to visit Susan after the surgery, but Susan didn't feel like having visitors, and she said so. Her colleague's response? "It's not?" The same theme came up again when our friend Katie had a brain aneurysm. YEAR IN REVIEW: 10 tips for a better life from The Times' Op-Ed pages in 2013 This woman loves Katie, and she said what she did because the sight of Katie in this condition moved her so deeply. Susan has since developed a simple technique to help people avoid this mistake. Draw a circle. Here are the rules. Everyone else can say those things too, but only to people in larger rings. When you are talking to a person in a ring smaller than yours, someone closer to the center of the crisis, the goal is to help. Comfort IN, dump OUT. Complaining to someone in a smaller ring than yours doesn't do either of you any good. Related:  à trier !KEEPERS

New Arrivals At SheIn | Shop Women’s Dresses, Tops, Shoes & Accessories Last Modified: [April 26th, 2018] This Privacy Statement explains how ZoeTop Business Co., Limited (collectively, "SHEIN," "we," "us," or "our") collect, use, share and process your information. Quick Links Click on the links below to go to a specific section of this Privacy Statement. Collection and Use of Personal Data Personal data is information that can be used to directly or indirectly identify you. Data you provide: We collect the personal data you provide when you use our products and services or otherwise interact with us, such as when you create an account, Contact Us, participate in an online survey, use our online help or online chat tool. Data about payments: If you make a purchase, we collect personal data in connection with the purchase. Providing, improving, and developing our products and services: We use personal data to help us provide, improve, and develop our products, services, and advertising. Cookies and Similar Technologies Disclosure of Personal Data Your Rights

Church Members Mistreat Homeless Man in Church Unaware It Is Their Pastor in Disguise Pastor Jeremiah Steepek transformed himself into a homeless person and went to the 10,000 member church that he was to be introduced as the head pastor at that morning. He walked around his soon to be church for 30 minutes while it was filling with people for service, only 3 people out of the 7-10,000 people said hello to him. He asked people for change to buy food – no one in the church gave him change. He went into the sanctuary to sit down in the front of the church and was asked by the ushers if he would please sit in the back. He greeted people to be greeted back with stares and dirty looks, with people looking down on him and judging him. As he sat in the back of the church, he listened to the church announcements and such. When all that was done, the elders went up and were excited to introduce the new pastor of the church to the congregation. “We would like to introduce to you Pastor Jeremiah Steepek.” The homeless man sitting in the back stood up and started walking down the aisle.

What Happens to Your Brain on Sugar, Explained by Science On the left is an image of your brain. In the center is your brain on drugs. Then, on the right, is your brain on sugar. Notice the similarities between the middle and right images? The normal brain has a lot more red stuff highlighted in it — called Dopamine. This chemical is produced in the part of the brain that is associated with reward. Let's take another look: Image: Wikimedia Commons This PET brain scans show chemical differences in the brain between addicts and non-addicts. This is what sugar does to your brain — the exact same thing smoking, alcohol and cocaine do. Just how bad is America's addiction to sugar? The Centers for Disease Control project a double- or triple-fold increase in the proportions of Americans with diabetes by 2050. In 2013, student-faculty research at Connecticut College found that in lab rats, Oreos, rich in sugar and fat, may be just as addictive as cocaine. So basically, Oreos are legal crack. Given all this, it's pretty likely you're over-consuming.

Want to Figure Out Your Body Shape? Try My Quiz - Inside Out Style One of the questions I get asked the most is “what’s my body shape?” I get emails daily from people wanting to know their shape which is why I have developed my free Body Shape Calculator Quiz. It’s a simple test to help you discover which of the 7 most common body shapes you may be. There are no measurements required (as measurements are not a reliable indicator of body shape as a circumference doesn’t tell you how your shape is distributed). Before you do the quiz, take a snap of yourself , straight on into the mirror wearing tight fitting leggings and tank or tee) or in your underwear if you like, you’re not about to show this photo to anyone!). Arms by your side, but not resting on or in front of your thighs. Make sure the photo is square to the camera, you want to see the silhouette of your body easily. Remember, when you’re answering the questions the three defining points are: ShouldersWaistHips Your bust is not part of this equation, it’s a body variation.

The Hard Part They never tell you in teacher school, and it's rarely discussed elsewhere. It is never, ever portrayed in movies and tv shows about teaching. Teachers rarely bring it up around non-teachers for fear it will make us look weak or inadequate. Valerie Strauss in the Washington Post once put together a series of quotes to answer the question "How hard is teaching?" The hard part of teaching is coming to grips with this: There is never enough. There is never enough time. As a teacher, you can see what a perfect job in your classroom would look like. You know all this, but you can also do the math. 110 papers about the view of death in American Romantic writing times 15 minutes to respond with thoughtful written comments equals -- wait! If you are going to take any control of your professional life, you have to make some hard, conscious decisions. Every year you get better. But every day is still educational triage. Not everybody can deal with this. Here's your metaphor for the day. Trust us.

The Ways Food Tricks Our Brains - Derek Thompson How restaurants, low-cal labels, candles, music, and even salads fool us into unhealthy eating. Freshly-baked Oreos (Aly Song/Reuters) In 1998, researchers from the University of Pennsylvania published a study that might strike you as kind of mean. They took two people with severe amnesia, who couldn’t remember events occurring more than a minute earlier, and fed them lunch. Then a few minutes later, they offered a second lunch. This might seem like a somewhat trivial discovery, but it unveils a simple truth about why we eat. While our stomachs know exactly what food we’re eating (since they’re the organ responsible for processing it) our brains are a bit more easily tricked. How Menus Trick Us Calorie counts can be good things. How Food Tricks Us Simply labeling a food as “healthy” makes it taste worse. In a series of studies written up in the latest JCR, researchers asked participants to eat bite-sized brownies while watching TV (fun!). How Ambience Tricks Us How Rules Trick Us

moodgym - FAQ moodgym was originally developed and evaluated over 15 years by researchers at the Australian National University. The principal authors of the content were Professor Helen Christensen and Professor Kathy Griffiths, who first scripted moodgym in 2001. Other staff provided clinical, technical and design expertise, and young people from the community provided feedback. The development and delivery of moodgym is now undertaken by e-hub Health – an ANU spin-off company managed by the senior moodgym team. Since its launch in 2001, moodgym has been extensively evaluated in a number of research trials undertaken by research groups around the world. A study in England found that use of moodgym as an adjunct to GP care did not substantially improve depression outcomes compared with usual GP care alone1. moodgym has also been shown to have a number of secondary benefits. 1. The new version of moodygm is also available in German.

The Hard Part | Peter Greene They never tell you in teacher school, and it’s rarely discussed elsewhere. It is never, ever portrayed in movies and tv shows about teaching. Teachers rarely bring it up around non-teachers for fear it will make us look weak or inadequate. Valerie Strauss in the Washington Post once put together a series of quotes to answer the question “How hard is teaching?” and asked for more in the comments section. My rant didn’t entirely fit there, so I’m putting it here, because it is on the list of Top Ten Things They Never Tell You in Teacher School. The hard part of teaching is coming to grips with this: There is never enough. There is never enough time. As a teacher, you can see what a perfect job in your classroom would look like. You know all this, but you can also do the math. 110 papers about the view of death in American Romantic writing times 15 minutes to respond with thoughtful written comments equals — wait! Every year you get better. But every day is still educational triage.

Urbanismo e Habitação, EM PDM de Vila Nova de GaiaRegulamentoPlanta de ordenamentoPlanta de condicionantesElementos que acompanham o planoOutros ElementosMapa Interativo PDM de Vila Nova de Gaia Os resultados da discussão pública da proposta de revisão do Plano Director Municipal (PDM) de Vila Nova de Gaia, foram divulgados através do “Relatório de Análise e Ponderação das Participações Recebidas no Período de Discussão Pública”, disponibilizado para consulta nas instalações da Gaiurb, On-line, na presente página e na comunicação social (com avisos em jornais nacionais e locais). A proposta de revisão do PDM contendo os resultados da ponderação da discussão pública foi aprovada nas reuniões públicas de Câmara de 01-06-2009 e 15-06-2009. De seguida e nos termos do artigo 79º do RJIGT, a Assembleia Municipal aprovou no dia 30-07-2009, todo o conteúdo documental da proposta final de revisão do PDM de Vila Nova de Gaia, On-line, na presente página. Regulamento Planta de ordenamento Para abrir os documentos PDF

Gregory Project concept envisions billboards to house the homeless The Gregory Project, by DesignDevelop (Image: DesignDevelop) Image Gallery (16 images) Gizmag is no stranger to projects which aim to turn the ubiquitous billboard into something more interesting, including an air-purifying billboard, and an artist's retreat. View all From the renders provided, the interior of the billboard looks small but relatively luxurious, and is split into two rooms. DesignDevelop told Gizmag that, since the billboard homes would be placed close to accommodated areas, there would be the possibility to connect them to local electricity, plumbing and water facilities. The project remains a concept at present, but DesignDevelop envisions that the Slovakian city of Banska Bystrica could see the first rollout of the Gregory Project, and it is hoped that the design could eventually spread worldwide. Sources: Gregory Project, DesignDevelop About the Author Adam is a tech and music writer based in North Wales. Post a CommentRelated Articles

A sort of Ms. Manners on How to Say the Right Thing - "It works in all kinds of crises -- medical, legal, even existential. It's the 'Ring Theory' of kvetching. The first rule is comfort in, dump out." by mojojuju Jan 26

Related: