http://www.ariel.com.au/jokes/The_Evolution_of_a_Programmer.html
How to Hunt Elephants MATHEMATICIANS hunt elephants by going to Africa, throwing out everything that is not an elephant, and catching one of whatever is left. EXPERIENCED MATHEMATICIANS will attempt to prove the existence of at least one unique elephant before proceeding to step 1 as a subordinate exercise. PROFESSORS OF MATHEMATICS will prove the existence of at least one unique elephant and then leave the detection and capture of an actual elephant as an exercise for their graduate students. Death by Caffeine We’ve used the very latest research to determine what’s appropriate for your body weight. See more about your daily caffeine limits. Recommendations for caffeine levels are different for aged 18 and under. The calculator is intended for use only by adults over 18.
PolarClock « pixelbreaker PolarClock 3.0 is now available as a screen saver for Mac and Windows, and also as a dashboard widget for OSX Tiger. This release is a total rebuild from scratch using Flash CS3, Flex Builder and ActionScript 3.0. There has been a staggering amount of feedback over the past few months, all of which was very useful. There are more things to add, but there are only so many hours in the day! New Features Language Selection (28 languages so far)Text alignment (outside, centre or inside of arc)Font size 12 – 30pt24/12 hour clock modesFlipping of text when it’s in the lower half of the arc (to stop it being upside down)Guidelines behind arcsArc properties (thickness, padding, radius )A spacer Arc for padding between Date and Time ( movable to be between any arc)Continuous/Stepped motion (continuous was requested a lot, so that you can see a minute slowly stretching each second to become the next minute etc).Ordering of the arcs.
Tutorial - Learn Python in 10 minutes NOTE: If you would like some Python development done, my company, Stochastic Technologies, is available for consulting. This tutorial is available as a short ebook. The e-book features extra content from follow-up posts on various Python best practices, all in a convenient, self-contained format. All future updates are free for people who purchase it. Preliminary fluff
A new career at 55 1. Why did you want to learn to code? Thirty years ago I was making $15 an hour as an analog draftsman and technical illustrator. Before I was laid off this past November, I was fighting to get $15 an hour for administrative jobs. So instead of letting the world push me into a tiny $15 box, I'm changing the game by reinventing myself. Humor - How to Shoot Yourself In the Foot Using Any Programming Language The proliferation of modern programming languages (all of which seem to have stolen countless features from one another) sometimes makes it difficult to remember what language you're currently using. This guide is offered as a public service to help programmers who find themselves in such dilemmas. 370 JCL You send your foot down to MIS with a 4000-page document explaining how you want it to be shot.
The 10 Types of Crappy Interviewees All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2015 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal. TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP Sony Nextep Computer Concept for 2020 by Hiromi Kiriki In 2020 We Can Wear Sony Computers On Our Wrist Our present need for internet connectivity is so profound that secondary devices like the Nextep Computer are bound to happen. Developed to be worn as a bracelet, this computer concept is constructed out of a flexible OLED touchscreen. Earmarked for the year 2020, features like a holographic projector (for screen), pull-out extra keyboard panels and social networking compatibility, make the concept plausible. Ten years from now is not too far away, so how many of you think we’d be buying such gadgets? Designer: Hiromi Kiriki
Improve website load time by 500% with 3 lines of code Major New Update - PHP SPEEDY: latest version available here There are 4 relatively easy ways by which you can speed up the time it takes a browser to download a page: Make fewer HTTP requestsAdd a far-future expires headerGzip your page's componentsMinify your JavaScript, CSS and HTML Following on from my post on joining CSS and JavaScript files, I have written a PHP script which will automatically do all of the above. All you have to do is call the following at the top of your page: The code What every computer science major should know Portfolio versus resume Having emerged from engineering and mathematics, computer science programs take a resume-based approach to hiring off their graduates. A resume says nothing of a programmer's ability.
Politics Explained FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk. PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.
A Showcase of Workstations that’ll Make You Jealous Whether you’re a designer, developer, animator, or blogger, your workstation plays a major role in how you get things done. Some of us like a neat, clean, and inspiring workspace, while others require a crazy over-the-top hardware configuration. In this article, we’ve compiled a showcase of photos that will give you workstation envy. The thing about workstations is that even if you have a nice one, seeing another awesome setup can make you a bit jealous. About the Author Signs that you're a bad programmer - Software Engineering Tips Why was this written? Most of these faults were discovered the hard way by the author himself, either because he committed them himself or saw them in the work of others. This paper is not meant for grading programmers, it was intended to be read by programmers who trust their ability to judge when something is a sign of bad practice, and when it's a consequence of special circumstances. This paper was written to force its author to think, and published because he thinks you lot would probably get a kick out of it, too. 1. Inability to reason about code
The Meaning of Life by Cliff Pickover The differences between men and women. This is my lastest book: The Book of Black: Black Holes, Black Death, Black Forest Cake, and Other Dark Sides of Life Easily read my latest tweets, for free, here.